I invite you to join me for a 30 Day No Yell challenge. This is a great way to initiate a more peaceful and intentional routine for your family. Almost all parents wish they raised their voices less with their kids. Let’s be honest, here. Lots of us have vocally overreacted and then feel badly afterward. The Author of the “What to Expect” series reassures us that all parents are sometimes guilty of “Losing your Cool”.
Moms and Dads alike feel overwhelmingly guilty as a result of yelling.
As a parent of six kids, here is what I have learned. I absolutely raise my voice to be heard above the volume of my troupe of children. The problem is that raising my voice makes them more vocal, and the cycle continues. So our house becomes loud and filled with commotion before I know it. Worst of all, no one ends up hearing what I had to say.
A 30 Day No Yell challenge will promote a more relaxed rhythm in the home.
The 30 Day “No Yell” Challenge works like this: for the next 30 days I will use strategies to correct, redirect, and set limits with my children that don’t involve raising my voice. I will “hold my yell”. Of course, emergencies don’t count.
The 30 Day Challenge is a strategy used by many parents, and was popularized by the The Orange Rhino. The Orange Rhino is written by an anonymous mom-blogger with four children. She offers many great tools to help you manage yelling, and a phone app.
Here Are Some Great Tips:
- Triggers- First I had to figure out what triggers make me want to shout. For me, these include feeling tired, or overwhelmed. But they different for each mom, so do a self-check when you feel like yelling.
- Tones- Know your tone and the effect it has on those hearing it. I know I have lots of different tones, depending on how I am feeling and the situation.
- Alternatives- It is helpful to explore alternatives to yelling, before you begin your no yell challenge. Or you can use the “hold a yell” concept. This means that no matter what the provocation or how you are feeling, just hold in that yell. It is kind of like when you had an extra coffee and are stuck in traffic. Wet skinny jeans are not an option.
Changing old habits isn’t easy, but it’s worth it.
Pick a start day and begin your No Yell Challenge. Try to avoid your triggers, and manage them when they cannot be avoided. Create yelling alternatives, and make an effort to lower your volume every day.
I am certain you’ll feel better about yourself and your parenting at the end of a successful 30 days. You’ll also feel more connected to your children, and their needs. Creating a calmer, quieter home lead to a more peaceful rhythm for our lives. It was an emotional investment I’m glad I made. Even if you are able to yell just a little less or speak a bit more quietly, consider your challenge successful.