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The Complete Idiot’s (Hubby’s) Guide to Mother’s Day

Foolproof Tips to Take Her Mother’s Day from “Just Eh” to EPIC

Okay dads, listen up: this one’s for you. Mother’s Day is around the corner and we may say we don’t want to make a big deal about it, but let’s be clear: Mother’s Day matters.

But for many moms, new ones especially, Mother’s Day often comes and goes without much ado. While you may have conquered Valentine’s Day and hit it out of the park on her birthday, celebrating Mother’s Day is new territory.

Mother's Day

She’ll swoon over a bouquet of leaves from your child. From you? Not so much.

Sure, you have experience with your own mother and you’ve probably figured out all the ways to brighten her day. But now you have double duty. And no, you cannot leave this burden up to your children until they are at least out of high school. They can get away with the scrawled cards and patchwork crafts they bring home from daycare….you can’t.

I’m not here to SCARE you. I’m here to SAVE you.

Follow this simple list of Do’s and Don’ts and you can rest assured you’ll impress that beautiful wife of yours while avoiding the perpetual silent treatment you may receive for several weeks after an underwhelming Mother’s Day.

We’ll get the negative stuff out of the way and start with what you SHOULD NOT do.

DON’T leave Mother’s Day plans up to us.

We always make the plans. We’ve already got every day of the kids’ summer booked, each meal for the next two weeks prepped, and college applications alphabetized and stamped (you can never plan too far ahead). So if you ask your wife what she wants to do on Mother’s Day, she’ll probably go ahead and make breakfast and suggest a few typical Sunday afternoon activities. But she won’t be happy about it.

DON’T stay home with the kids.

Of course we love you and we love our children. But while you may think on Mother’s Day that we must want to celebrate spending the day with you and the little ones, I’m here to tell you we don’t.

Give us a day off being “Mom”. And that includes, but is not limited to, not serving meals and snacks, not wiping bottoms, and NOT managing time outs. 

What this may mean is that she locks herself in the bedroom with snacks and Netflix only interrupted by the possibility of a blissful siesta. So it may be best to plan on leaving the premises entirely.

DON’T give us an appliance for a Mother’s Day gift.

While we may covet the next big innovative kitchen tool (I vowed I would finally cut carbs forever thanks to “the Spiralizer”….where is that thing anyway?), and we may complain about the lackluster suction power of our Dyson, do not assume we’ll be thrilled to receive one for Mother’s Day. Holidays should be about giving what we want, not what we need.

Besides, we know you’ll grab it at Bed, Bath, & Beyond and forget to bring the 20% off coupon which means we’ll have to go back with the receipt to get the discount. Which means we could just pick it up ourselves in the first place…and at that point the sentiment is basically lost. 

And that’s another task we just DON’T want to do on Mother’s Day.

This brings us to what we DO want.

DO let us sleep in. 

Mother's Day

  Taking the Overnight Shift is Worth its                                 Weight in Gold

 

This should be a given but I must state it as a reminder of its crucial nature. Even if your little ones sweetly insist on preparing breakfast in bed, convince your children that it will be a much better day for all of you if you let her get up for breakfast in her own time. 

Even if that doesn’t happen until noon.

 

DO spend some time with YOUR Mom. 

We get it…we’re not the ONLY moms in the world.  Please continue to shower your mother with gifts and affection to make up for the years YOU brought home the backwards written cards and handprint masterpieces. 

And since most grandmothers will admit the best part of having kids is having grandkids, be sure to bring them along (refer to “Don’t #1″)!

Do splurge.

Mother's Day gifts

A little decadence goes a long                       way

Just because we may want some time to ourselves on Mother’s Day doesn’t mean we’re not craving a small token of affection on your way out the door.  To say our personal budget since having kids takes a hit is an understatement. 

One way to satisfy her shopping cravings on Mother’s Day and beyond is to consider a subscription box. As much as we love to shop, actually leaving the house is just another unnecessary chore. Whether she fancies clothing, jewelry, wine, or all of the above, she can look forward to goodies arriving right at the doorstep.

Here’s a small sampling of companies offering customized options based on personal taste and the choice of a one time delivery or monthly subscription.

Do some dirty work.

On my first Mother’s day my husband scrubbed and cleaned our guest bathroom. It was the perfect present. I HATE cleaning the bathroom, but I LOVE when it’s sparkling clean. So while monetary gifts are fun to receive, now that I’m a mother, time truly is money.  

Deep clean and polish her car. Wash the walls and windows, dust the ceilings fans, and scrub the grout. These are the most menial of housework chores, but often fall to the wayside. If you don’t have the time or energy to do it yourself, a cleaning service is another excellent gift choice. Reach out to her friends to get a reputable recommendation. But I’ll give you fair warning if you decide to go this route: she may not want to give it up.

So…if after reading this you feel like there is a LOT of pressure and hard work ahead,remember her labor and childbirth.

If that’s not enough, don’t forget that Father’s Day is right around the corner. And trust me, we already have it planned.

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